R-E-S-P-E-C-T
The Minnesota Masonic Heritage Center general director’s statement, “We aren’t buying anymore toys for you!” was just one of the many jibes that he had made since I was first hired. I have tried to keep this tale fun and full of interesting facts, but there was an underlying atmosphere of abuse while working with the CEO and general director during my two years on the project. It started out as a very subtle undercurrent that grew into a raging river by the spring of 2016.
I work with men all of the time and take all of their comments in stride, considering the context, factoring in the age of the man, and understanding the region that I am visiting. I have seldom encountered disrespect while working with Masons across the country. However, there is always the “test” as I begin any Masonic project and consider it as a type of initiation. The men are curious to see how much I really know. I realize that this is why scenery inventory sheets are never available at the beginning of most projects. The absence of these documents has necessitated the creation of a fun game called, “Guess that degree in three feet.” This game involves my calling out the scene and the corresponding degree for the drop being lowered from the flies within the first three feet of visibility. It earns the immediate respect of the men. After an hour of gentle “play,” all of the books and photographs pertaining to a scenery collection are soon placed on my worktable. It really doesn’t bother me as I see it as an opportunity to hone my own skills and knowledge about degree productions. In all of these interactions, I have seldom sensed any vibe from my Masonic volunteers other than genuine respect.
Now I speak of the men that I have worked with side-by-side in the restoration and evaluation “trenches.” I am not speaking of the Masons who occasionally come in to check on my “progress.” I understand that there are many Freemasons who truly resent me for my understanding of the Craft. Many of these same men, not only dislike me for my gender, but also my knowledge as an outsider. It has never bothered me though, as I continue to focus on the bigger picture – preserving Masonic heritage. I am not trying to infiltrate an organization and suggest that they suddenly begin the initiation of women.
What I encountered while working on the Minnesota Masonic Heritage Center was something else entirely and I was completely unprepared for it. The reference to the Fort Scott drops as my “toys” was neither the beginning nor the end of a torrent of disrespect. I had no other option than to rise above it and try to ignore it at the time. There was nothing else I could do, as the general director was there to stay for the long term. Like me, he had been hired without committee selection or board approval. The CEO had single hiring and firing authority and he would never dismiss his friend; doing so would admit that he made a mistake. The CEO and general director had a working history that spanned over two decades and I was odd “man” out.
The type of disrespectful treatment that I encountered on the project was so foreign to me that I didn’t even know what to do other than document it. As the abuse increased throughout the fall of 2015, I decided to keep a daily record of all interactions and started to carefully file away all emails on a separate hard drive. I have always had a work journal, but it solely documented materials, labor, research, and process – never anything personal. From that point on, I kept a detailed log of every interaction and every derogatory statement. This turned into my own personal publication titled, “Memoirs of a Masonic Mishap.” It kept me sane during 2016. Simply stated, work and all interactions with the CEO and general director became sheer hell.
I had a hunch that I was being set up for a very big fall as the emails from the CEO began to suggest that I was unskilled for my position. He was attempting to systematically discredit me and remove my name from all contributions. My colleagues began to suggest that I just leave the abuse and resign from my position, saying, “Go! Just leave them high and dry!” However, I simply couldn’t do that. I truly believed that the heritage center had the potential to be something special and I wanted to remain a part of it. There had to be a way to change this and I threw myself into every project even more.
But like the scenery, it is difficult to make people appreciate something that they just don’t value.
To be continued…
